The last two years have been a total switch to me and I must admit they were challenging.
Overcome low self-esteem.
I know that self-doubting comes when one doesn’t trust in its self, but low self-esteem comes from a deeper feeling. I believe it comes from a self-image that we have of ourselves. An image that is built generally in time. I was always a shy guy and an introvert. But coming from the street helped me to somehow overcome that. Even if deep down inside I am still an introvert I learned to live with the feeling and in time became a part of me, of who am I. I kind of learned to accept that I am like that and stopped imagined “what will they think of me”, officially now, I don’t care! Not in an arrogant “I don’t care” but in a “I know what I can do” way.
Becoming a Minister
I always wanted to help people. That is since I know myself. Growing in an adverse environment back in my own country during the communist government, I’ve seen so many needs and lacks that I got to promise myself that I will help everyone will come in my way. In time, I forgot the promise and due to poverty, I started to live on the streets. I wrote part of the story here. Living on the streets, the next (most”natural”) step is to start to steal. At 12 years one doesn’t know so many things to do, and that is an “easy” task. With the passing years, life took a very interesting line for me and I became a Military Police, then worked in Logistics, and during this time I was developing my desire to help people and became a minister in Christianity.
As a minister, you encounter lots of broken people. I learned that there is no way on how to fix people. We can’t do that. They can only fix themselves. They just need the right tool. The tool for some is God, for some is a dream, and for some are both. I got both because while I was helping others getting themselves fixed, I was broken inside. I was smiling on the outside but I was desperate on the inside. My life was leaking away feeling unfulfilled by having a small role in my family’s life. Between 9-5 job, and then the minister life, I was barely able to be there with them.
Programming saves some of us
In 2019 I’ve met my second first love: programming. Though I don’t consider myself a full programmer, I do have clients that they think I am doing a pretty good job, I think that is why they hire me. I tried to work for some agencies and I don’t doubt the benefits of working in teams, in an AGILE environment, it’s just that the agencies I’ve met up to this point weren’t fitting or vice-versa. Meanwhile, I gave up searching to work for someone and decided to go freelance. Best decision ever. Now my kids have a father that is always there, I am my own boss and I learned to say the most important word in my life: “NO”. I got to say at the end of this short article that becoming a web developer is not as easy as having an ice cream, but it is doable. I am planning to write another article about how to get clients in generally, what tools I used and how to get exposure. Until next time, keep coding.
Luc, web developer at his early 40’s